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January 24, 2008

Brian Van Gorder Ditches Spurrier. Returns to Falcons


Breaking News: Brian Van Gorder is on the cusp of becoming the new defensive coordinator of the Atlanta Falcons according to the Atlanta Journal, The State, CSTV and GamecockCentral.com. Apparently, he always wanted to be a [____insert type of coaching job here______].

Van Gorder is the former defensive coordinator of the South Carolina Gamecocks, former linebackers coach of the Atlanta Falcons, former head coach of Georgia Southern, former linebackers coach of the Jackonsville Jags, former defensive coordinator for UGA, etc, etc, etc, etc, etc.

This will be Van Gorder's sixth job in the past five seasons. Pardon me while I laugh at the Gamecocks for a minute. Chuckle. Chuckle. Chuckle. Van Gorder was set to meet with four star Palmetto State blue chipper defensive end Robert Quinn today. I'm sure that visit will go swimmingly well for the chickens.

Prediction: The Gamecocks will hire someone else -- probably John Tenuta or John Hoke -- and the Gamecock Nation will loudly proclaim that this new genius locks up their 42nd consecutive Pre-season National Championship Trophy.

Update: Van Gorder has now resigned as Falcons defensive coordinator to become the head coach of the Wayne State Titans. He always wanted to be a college head coach.

Update: Van Gorder has resigned as head coach of Wayne State to become the cheerleading coach of the Ft. Lauderdale Fighting Tigers. He announced that he always wanted to coach cheerleaders.

See Also:
-- All Georgia Sports Blog Stories about Brian Van Gorder

(Ht - Kit Kitchens)

PWD

23 comments:

Anonymous said...

This is just to funny. Also Tenuta appears to be headed to Washington.

Anonymous said...

whatever happened to Tenuta to LSU?

Unknown said...

Two best lines on SC message boards:

1. "Let's go trash VanGoder [sic] yard. Wait a minute he don't even have a yard yet." (Upstate GC)

2. And with that, BVG becomes the most successful D-Coordinator in the history of South Carolina football" (DawgRoll)

Crane said...

supposedly LSU is promoting within/creating co-DC's position

Astronaut Mike Dexter said...

Two words: OMG. LOLZ.

Does anyone know if Kevin Ramsey needs a job?

Anonymous said...

How about the old "Swamp Fox", Marion Campbell? He is from SC

Anonymous said...

Damn. Just damn.

Anonymous said...

I really cannot believe this...
The guy is worse than Petrino.

Anonymous said...

The first thing I thought of when Smith was named HC was that BVG would become the coons next DC. Turns out I was dead on, as usual.

JasonC said...

There are rumors that Ellis Johnson is going to SC. In a very VanGorderesque move, he just left Miss St to go to Ark with Petrino and is now headed to Columbia (perhaps).

Anonymous said...

"The first thing I thought of when Smith was named HC was that BVG would become the coons next DC. Turns out I was dead on, as usual."


yeah, that's why you post anonymously.

Anonymous said...

one of the posters on the Chikin board called him "VanGoner"...that's pretty good for poultry.

Who'd have thought anyone could make Bobby Petrino look like the model of stability?

Kevin Ramsey is rested and ready. All Spurrier has to do is call him....though first, the OBC may want to brush up on his boxing skills.

Anonymous said...

"There are rumors that Ellis Johnson is going to SC. In a very VanGorderesque move, he just left Miss St to go to Ark with Petrino and is now headed to Columbia (perhaps)."

Fantastic. Outstanding! Couldn't happen to a more deserving SOB, imho.

Ditto those thoughts on Van Gorder bitch-slapping Spurrier as well.

Anonymous said...

This could not have worked out any better. In one fell swoop, BVG has ensured we don't have to face an improved SC defense, the Falcons get one heck of a coordinator, Tony Taylor will almost surely be back for next year, Ellis Johnson bolts for Columbia to fill the vacancy, and the two most arrogant asshats in the conference have it broken off in them. You're a DGD, BVG.

Anonymous said...

anon 3:56 -
you're one to talk dipshit.

Anonymous said...

Regardless of his past moves, I can't blame him for this one at all.

Smitty said...

South Carolina Football...Got to love it.

Anonymous said...

Well, if you think about it, the Falcons are the South Carolina of the NFL.

Anonymous said...

Before we know it he will be the Special Teams coach for Arkansas....or the Waterboy for Tech.

Anonymous said...

I think South Carolina is better than the Falcons both relative to the level of competition and also straight up.

Smitty said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Smitty said...

The Falcons have won a conference title in 1998. When did South Crackalaka?

Hobnail_Boot said...

smitty-

Why, that very year the mighty 'cocks defeated national powerhouse Ball State on their way to an amazing 1-10 season.

 
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