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July 13, 2005

Spurrier Test Drives NCAA 2006

Georgia Dawg Blog Contributing Writer SaxonDawg Sat Down with Stever Spurrier for a Game of NCAA 2006 on the Xbox....

Steve Spurrier, the Evil Genius, is returning from exile. For him, 2004 was a season of glaring at the gridiron through his crystal ball, with his flying monkeys chattering around him. "I'll get you, Foley," he still mumbles occasionally, "and your little dog, too."

It's almost time, and the OBC is fiesty and restless, relentlessly swishing air tee-offs onto the links of his imagination.

We at the Dawg Blawg had little trouble talking Coach Superior into a round of digital pigskin, via EA Sports' new edition of NCAA Football for the X-Box. Saxondawg chose to play the part of Central Florida, Spurrier's first opponent. The OBC, of course, took . . .

Spurrier vomits a little in his own mouth upon realizing he's in Columbia
OBC: HA. Ha. You media guys. Pulling the ol' ball coach's leg. Seriously...

SD: I am being serious. After all, South Carolina, that's your new team, right?

OBC: South CAROLINA? That the one near Augusta? Okay, I think you're right. Just wrappin' my mind around the new job, ya know? Any idea if I actually signed the papers?

SD: Think so, Coach. Look, you kicked off and my Golden Knights are setting up a return.

OBC: Gimme my trigger thingy. The Ol' Ball Coach is gonna throw the ball around the yard, fun it-gun it, toss n' catch...

SD: Wow, I returned the kick for a touchdown! CF 7, Gamecocks 0.
Spurrier can't watch as the Gamecocks get rolled by UGA. Even wearing Orange doesn't scare the Dawgs

OBC: Wait a minute. The Ol' Ball Coach wasn't ready. And what kind of mascot is that fat ball of Crisco there? Needs his fanny kicked.

SD: That's not the mascot, that's our UCF head coach. O'Leary. That wiggling cellulite is rendered really well, graphically, eh? Do you think they did a good job on your stadium?

OBC: Well, they left out the big orange thing with Welcome to the Swamp across it.

SD: Focus, Coach. Columbia.

OBC: HA. ha. Smartass media scribe. Watch my razzle dazzle on your kickoff.

SD: OOO, what a hit! My guy scoops it! Dances into the endzone...

OBC: Hey, kid, I ever tell ya what FSU stands for? Free Shoe…

SD: Yeah, you told me that one. Here's your visor back, Coach. You know, about this Florida stuff, you really need to move on.

OBC: Truth is, I told ol' Foley the package I needed for comin' back. Take it or leave it, I say, if you want the ol' coach to come toss it around the yard at UF.
Spurrier realizes he played his hand poorly with Foley

SD: And then, I heard Foley told you, you can't spell UF without FU. Okay, we're at 14-0 on the X-Box. Now we should get to see some Evil Genius strategy here, right?

OBC: Evil Genius strategy is to stick in Wueffel, maybe Shane. Which button does that?

SD: None. You got to use the guys that X-Box gave you.

OBC: (pinches mouth inward, looks at ceiling) See, this is what happened in DC. Owner won't let the ol' coach play his own ball. Now, Bill Gates tellin' me who I can play. Needs his fanny kicked.

SD: Here's your visor again. You gonna call a play?

OBC: HA. Ha. No, gonna call a few Bull Gators, hit the fairway.

SD: Coach--think Columbia. Like they say, Toto, we're not in Kansas anymore.

OBC: (clicking heels) There's no place like home, there's no place like home.

Written By SaxonDawg for the Georgia Football Dawg Blog. Link away.


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