Seen here preparing to kick your ass.
Week 1 - Coach O on the recruiting trail
Highlight: "Woke up buck nekkid this morning. That felt good, so I called over to South Panola and I said "Coach, you got any god-danged players that I ain't offered yet." Sumbitch said "No, Coach O!" so I hung up and called Chief Thundercloud Junior High in Minot, North Dakota and before the girl could say "Porcupine Athletics," I said "I'm offering your whole damn team and I don't want to wait on 'em to graduate, neither, I want their little war-whoopin' tomahawk-slingin' butts here this spring and ready to whup some Starkville ass." Then I hung up. That felt good.
Week 2 -- Coach O's QB Camps
Highlight: 'If it was up to me, we wouldn't have any damn quarterbacks. Outscoring teams is a sissy-ass way to win! We'd put 22 linemen out there and just beat the other team into submission -- that's real football. But we've got some candy-ass alumni who say 'Coach O, we want to score a touchdown this year!' So I brought your asses in here to make them happy.
Week 3 - Recruiting in Louisiana
Highlights: So we went tear-assin’ south across Mississippi and wasn’t too long until we were back in Bayou des Cheveaux, Louisiana. I pulled into town and jumped out of the car, and a lot of people there recognized me as sort of a celebrity since I am one of the eight gainfully-employed Cajuns in the United States of America. So I told those people, I said “I’ve got some Starkviller ass to kick! DO YOU HAVE ANY FOOTBALL PLAYERS THAT CAN BY-GOD HELP ME??
Week 4: On Family Issues and Compliance (not as funny as the others)
Highlight: Some-damn-body told me the other day that it was some sort of NCAA Dead Period and I said "Fine, then we won't recruit any damn boys who are dead in this period. And if the N-C-By-God-A don't like that, they can..."
Week 5 - Not funny to me, but maybe to you.
Week 6 - The SEC Meetings in Destin and Fulmer's Thong
Highlight: Well, there's a lot of crying and screaming. The weak-ass Starkviller contingent, hell, they just faint dead away. Even my two little boys, Jackie Fargeuax Orgeron and Tojo Yamamoteaux Orgeron, are getting a little puffy-eyed. So !I said to myself "Ed, you are the BY-GOD HEAD COACH at Ole Miss. A great school. The school of ... well, I tried to think of some tough-ass people who went to Ole Miss but could only come up with William Faulkner and that Miss America from 1962, so I just said "Screw it, you're BY-GOD Ed Orgeron!" And I turned and looked square at [Fulmer's] cheeks.
Week 7: Coach O on Golfing and Spurrier
Highlight: So I walk over, shake hands with Spurrier and tell him "One other thing, son, we're coming to Columbia this year and kick your WORTHLESS GAMECOCK ASS!
"What are you talking about, Ed?" Spurrier says. "Ole Miss isn't even on our schedule this year."
"Who said anything about schedule?" I said. "What I said was WE ARE COMING TO COLUMBIA TO KICK YOUR ASS. We got a school plane at Ole Miss and it ain't doin' nothin' on Tuesday nights or Sunday mornings. So you just get your boys ready, 'cause we're coming - and bringin' PURE-D HELL with us."
(HT: dawgiestyle on DawgPost.com)
14 comments:
As an Ole Miss alum and lifelong fan, I find this shit totally funny as hell.
I think Ole Miss firing David Cutcliffe was a dumbass thing to do, but I just can't get enough of Le Orgeron.
Yeah, Ole Miss Made A Huge Mistake firing Cutcliffe! Look at all the HC offers he got when he left. What were we thinking?!?
He left The Rebels in great shape talent-wise too...
Cutcliffe is one of the greatest offensive minds in football, still is... Irregardless of their pro-career's, he also coached Heath Shuler, Tee Martin, Andy Kelley, Steve Allatorre, and Tony Robinson... along with The career's of Peyton and Eli speak for themselves.
Your problem wasn't David's ability, it was the fact that your defense was horrendous.
"Irregardless of their pro-career's"...
"Irregardless" is not a word. Regardless, Go Hogs!
Well, Cutcliffe was the head coach, not OC so he was incharge of defense too.
Thank God for the Razorback fan!
That 'irregardless' crap drives me f-ing nuts. As does the use of 'PERrogative' by Kevin Simons' dumbass, faux-black militant, Bobby Brown lyric-stealing-ass daddy over on Volscat.
Yeah, If it weren't for the genius of Cut the Mannings would be selling mobile homes today. Hey, ever heard of guy named Spurlock? Cut worked and nutured him for 4 years. The result-- the most unproductive QB in Ole Miss history. Cut never played a down in college football. Genius my ass. Where were all those HC offers? My my, there were none. If I was an opponent of Ole Miss I would want him to stay too. Dumbf
Jdigger. Give me alittle credit! Lately i've been experimenting with this little thing called "sarcasm".
Obviously He Got NO Offers and He left Ole Miss with nothing.
He may be a great QB coach, but he's far from an decent HC.
Who rode the Mannings coattails? Seems to me the whole Ole Miss football program has ridden the Mannings coattails. Cutcliffe can say that he was a part of many fine teams at UT when there were no Mannings around. What can Ole Miss say? Seems like their only decent seasons in the last 40 years came on the "Mannings coattails."
It took sheer genius to hire Cut in the first place. Even more to hire Orgeron.
Genius to hire Orgeron?? Let's see...they wanted someone with HC experience at the D-1 level...when they didn't start lining up at the door, the standard was lowered.
Let's see how happy the OM faithful will be with Omygod after a couple more seasons.
Orgeron is Ole Miss's Savior
you will all be eating your words when he starts tearing it up in the SEC
you guys lucked out with such a talented coach
Coach O tearing up the sec? Bwhahahahahahahahahahahahahahah
40-7
That is funny stuff..I don't care who you are
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