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January 7, 2011

The Curse of Colt Brennan

I've been suspecting this for several months now, but I think I finally have proof. I don't speak Hawaiinese fluently but I think these dudes are saying (roughly translated):

If you beat us and hurt our sweet Colt,
Your foes will rejoice with feasts of coconuts
As you never win big game again.
You'll fall to the weak
And your dog will always be sick.

I think Hawai'i put a curse on us. I'm no expert on the black arts, but I'm familiar with the concept of cause and effect. Since that game, our beloved play-by-play man has gotten so frail as to be unable to call games, we've gotten our asses handed to us repeatedly by good teams, we've lost in the most excruciating ways possible to average teams, we've lost a mascot, another mascot has gotten dreadfully sick, we've gotten arrested, and the mood of our fanbase is as bad as I've ever seen. How else to explain this much bad stuff happening to one program in such a short period of time?


Quinton's observation leads me to construct a slightly different, yet related, theory that Colt Brennan brought one of these to Mark Richt before the Sugar Bowl. And he's been wearing it around his neck ever since.
No! CMR, the tiki gives you bad juju!



Anonymous said...

I knew it.

81Dog said...

This could be like that episode of Gilligan's Island where the voodoo doctor made the dolls of the castaways, and havoc ensued until Gilligan turned the tables on said voodoo doctor. Just make a Colt Brennan doll, let Marcus Howard jab it with pins, sack it, whatever, and voila. End of curse.

although, to be fair, you'd have to say Marcus Howard laid such a spectacular beating on Colt that night in the Sugar Bowl, UGA is still ahead on points. I'm not surprised Brennan is playing football after that game. I'm surprised he can feed himself without assistance.

beebler said...

I hope you guys know Colt Brennan was in a car accident more recently that nearly costed him his life, as well as two others. It's funny to talk about but not when it actually happens.

Anonymous said...

Well, you guys must've done something, because Colt was involved in a near-fatal 2-car accident on the Big Island about a month ago (he was a passenger in his girlfriend's car) that did leave him truly incapacitated. His head injuries alone were so severe that he still remembers nothing of the incident.

- Hawaii Alum

Anonymous said...

This reminds me of that scene in "Major League" when the Eddie Harris, the pitcher, took issue with Cerrano's idol and cursed it.

Then, bad things started happening.

Maybe we should've offered Willie as a sacrifice after the game to appease the gods.

Jasmine said...

Colt Brennan....Colorado coed accident....NFL bust......karma? Hmmmmmm.

Kolby Solinsky said...

I think Colt Brennan's had enough bad fortune – his fault or otherwise – that the curse can go both ways. Still, love the poetry. Keep up the good work

aloha shaka mahalo said...

Colt Brennan: From WAC/Colorado rapist to FAILURE with the Redskins, Raiders, and Texans. What a joke he is.

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