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April 4, 2013

Exclusive: Marshall Henderson's first draft of his letter to Ole Miss fans*

Dear all you old assholes that hassle me and haters,

Coach told me that I had to do something because some folks in the administration was all like 'Henderson is a loose cannon and shit.' So this is that something. I mean if I'm gonna get paid, I got to be all like cool and whatnot. Cause I'm cool.

Some people don't like me because I am a player. Well, did I take liberties with your ladies? Hell yeah. I know we won the SEC and all, but if my team would have done anything to help me get about ten more shots, we'd have gone to the Sweet 16 in LA.

You know I'd have rocked LA, bro. If Steve Nash can ball there, I know I am golden.

Anyways, I'm only have a few classes left before taking my spinning talents to the professional DJ circuit. That don't mean I'm outie, tho. Naw. After being in Utah, Oxford is heaven, with the ladies and drinks and whatnot. Besides, I got another 1000 shots left in me, if you know what I mean. This SEC athlete life is for me, brah.

To all the haters. F---- y'all. Just cause you ain't seen someone just ball to ball. Yeah, that's my game. Get. Over. It. Assholes. I ain't changing a MFING thing. Deal, yo.

I know I own this town now. I have to hold myself to that. I am Hottie Toddy, bitches.

Marshall Henderson



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